James Madison, the fourth president of the United states, was instrumental in the drafting of the US constitution. He warned against creating laws so voluminous to read, and i am not too sure probably against voluminous document i would want to believe so.
I swirled my office chair twice before sitting. It was always a test ride for me, that soon became an habit especially since the joke the guys played on me, exchanging my chair for the bad one and straight to the floor with a back ache throughout the week was a reward.
‘Hi, could you help check this document and summarize’ an heavy paged book shook my desk. Turning to see the sender that dropped, it was suprisingly my boss . She never assigned work herself and i wasn’t so sure she even recognized me in a office that er had close to 80 others working at different department.
On a monday morning… Who wishes to get fired. I threw a two finger up and screamed ‘Roger it’ she gave a sacred look at the way i reacted, and then with a smile she walked away, as gossips flew over the place… What they discussed, i don’t know.. I cared to know… But it seems as if i heard her say before 12:00pm on Monday she requested to see the summary.. 5 lines each page by page.
I thought i was supposed to be the audit man, but it seems my work has been handed to me in a more pathetic way.
Taking a break i peeped at my phone for new social media messages. From the look of time it didn’t seem as if i had spent long on it. Really just a page had i summarized for over 40 minute. Plus i wasn’t sure of what it meant.
I went to the scanning room, for the scanning guy to send the over 5000 worth of document meant to be an agreement mailed to me. I had no other choice than find a freelancer online.
In less than 32 hours, victory was mine, my gig guy message popped up on my mail with the subject note “Finished”
Highly recommendable and efficient i thought. Browsing quickly through my tie shelve for any tie that spoke itself ‘excellence’
“What are you doing?” My aunt bagged in to my room as she heard some sort of recital in front of the mirror which i can guess looked scary, considering the impressive words i had picked out from the dictionary without caring for the meaning.
“The smell of promotion”
With a smile unrelentingly leaving the corner of my mouth the next day, i matched straight to the printing room… Watching each paper file up on each other. Never had i felt this proud.
The secretary to my boss after a quick call to her opened the door for me and there stood my promotion also dressed in a cute blue wear.
“What did you just do? Shoving up over 5000 pages of classified government top secret on the internet. Do you know what…….” my eye stared wide at her.. I wasn’t so sure i was listening to what else she was saying but it didn’t look like the words sounded in anyway like a promotion.
“You are fired effectively!”
I looked down at the paper in my hand for the first time and then opened the next page.
“Government claims responsibility of the 2001 act of the … Its intelligence officer was too late too.. ”
I closed the book. Maybe it would have been right to actually drop it on her table but a fired man like myself feeling so ashamed at what i did and the way everyone gleaned their eye over to me disgracefully was just the least of my problems. My gig guy failed me! I kept cluttering in thoughts.
If only they had just kept it simple other than the complicated wordings on each page. Printed copy of the documents were disbursed. I just found a way to make the media sell more.
I was just one step away from jail…Religious or not… My head was blank on the next step in life.